Deamons
by CapSwanKacie
Summary: The night after everything was revealed, Emma finds Killian back in her living room. What will the consequences of her actions be? Will true love conquer all?


The Demons Inside Me

 _When the days are cold_

 _And the cards all fold_

 _And the saints we see_

 _Are all made of gold_

 _When your dreams all fail_

 _And the ones we hail_

 _Are the worst of all_

 _And the blood's run stale_

 _I wanna hide the truth_

 _I wanna shelter you_

 _But with the beast inside_

 _There's nowhere we can hide_

 _No matter what we breed_

 _We still are made of greed_

 _This is my kingdom come_

 _This is my kingdom come_

I can't feel my tears coming until they fall down my cheek. I've been staring at him the whole time but I don't see him anymore. In the last 24 hours he's done a complete 180.

He's become what he knew he would. What he warned me about. I should've listened but even in the wake of this argument, the second one since he found out last night, I wouldn't change my decision. I still believe I can help him. I can save him from himself. Well from the darkness, that I put there.

I'm snapped back into the moment when I hear a crash against the wall and another as the unbroken part of the vase hits the floor. Glass shattering and scatters across the floor.

"Oh, do I have your attention now, Swan?!"

"Killian..."

"No, stop. You don't get to speak right now."

I mentally shiver at the sound of his voice. Deep, husky and a slight change in his accent as he allows his anger to seep through. The words lingering like a bad odor between us as we stare at each other in silence for what feels like forever before he speaks again.

"Do you know what this feels like? This voice in my head driving me to do and say what it wants? Oh that's right...you do, because you felt the same thing too. But did you take one second to think about that before you decided to do what you did?! No!"

His voice gaining volume with the end of that speech. Is this where he wants me to speak now? Does he actually want to hear what I have to say? Looking down at the pale hand that had fell to his side after using it for emphasis during his explanation. I instinctively reach for it. I can hear the hiss escape his lips at the contact but he doesn't make any movement to pull away. I lace out fingers together holding them both in front of us as I slowly begin to speak.

"Killian, I can help you. This is what I wanted all along to be able to help you control that voice like you did for me. I know we can do this together if you just let us." The tear escaping my eye as I tighten my grip on his hand.

"Why Swan? What makes you so sure you can help me? In the state were both in, what makes you so sure this darkness won't engulf us both until there's no light left for either of us to hold onto?" The words lower than before, with a slight twinge of pain in the words.

"Because I believe in us. In our love for each other. In our future..." Before I could finish I felt his body shift towards me, before I could react our lips were moving together like a strong wave of passion, pain and fear all rolled into one emotion.

My mind hazing as the breath I faught so hard to regain earlier was slowly leaving my body. What was happening? My legs beginning to go weak, shaking slightly. I think he either felt this or sensed it because Killian's arm snaked around my waist pulling my hips the rest of the way towards him. The heat of the kiss searing my lips in a bittersweet pain. I start to question if I should make the move to pull away to gain some composure but before I can reflect on that anymore, Killian breaks the kiss, breathless as I feel his forehead lean against mine as he rolls his head to the side opening his clenched eyes to look at mine while trying to regain the breath we both lost.

It comes out in a barely audible sound...

"Killian..." It almost sounded like a squeak. He had moved his hand from my waist to the back of my neck. Jerking my head towards his and as our lips came together again. But not for a kiss. His words vibrated against the outside corner of my mouth, "Where's our bloody bedroom, Swan?" Nipping at the underside of my jawline with his teeth. His words hitting my ears as my heart jumped into my throat so that I couldn't speak. Did he just say _our_ bedroom? I shook it off as a moment of passion. Is this how we really wanted our first time to be?

I'd thought about this moment since, well, since that first date. But I hadn't really thought it'd be in this manner. Full of complete and utter lust. I had just always expected a little more special moment. But at this point, I will let him take me anyway he wants as I feel that all too familiar heat building from below my abdomen. I bite my bottom lip before sliding my free hand down his chest and letting it join the other clutching his tightly as I began to guide him up the stairs to the long hallway. Gesturing towards the end of the hallway where the moonlite sneaking through the curtains and the tree outside the window had created a shadow dancing across the giant king size bed in the center of the room. The rod iron bed was drapped with a dark navy blue comforter and looked more than inviting at this very moment. Before I could think of another coherent thought I felt his free arm snake around me again, effortlessly lifting me up and sliding his other arm under my legs, his hook digging slightly at the base of my thigh.

He took what felt like just a few steps and we were already next to the bed. I felt his arms sliding out from under me as I was dropped the few inches onto the bed before he leaned over the edge and completely covered the top half of my body with his, roughly claiming my lips in a searing kiss again.

I felt his hand sliding up my body from my waist, up the sides of my breasts, over my shoulder to rest at the back of my neck, pulling it upwards to a upright position but never breaking our lips from each other. I could feel his hand slightly digging into the base of my neck, then it slid up onto the back of my head releasing the clip that was holding the hair in the bun at the back of my scalp. Almost in an instant, he had let my hair fall loosely to my shoulders, before snaking his hands into it again and grabbing ahold of a small handful and jerking my head backwards. His lips, hot as fire, trailed down my jaw once again and to my neck, where he moved to open his mouth and began nipping and sucking at the skin.

That was it for me. My head was swimming. A shocked but pleasured gasp escaping from my mouth loud enough that he could hear, I felt his lips close in a knowing smirk. He knew what he was doing to me. That it had been way too long for the both of us. Not only waiting for each other, but since we had been with anyone. This was going to be hard to make it last long enough to even remember what the other feels like the next day. But I feel like this would probably be something I won't soon forget either.

As his mouth continued to seek to move over every inch of skin, I was wiggling under him to take off this god for saken leather that was constricting me from feeling him fully. Helping for a small moment he grabbed the center ripping the snap from the flap of leather across the front and making quick work of it to throw the unneeded article of clothing to the floor. Standing for just a moment, I knew what he was requesting, propping myself up long enough to remove the leather jacket and vest from his top half, we were finally flesh to flesh. The heat our bodies were omitting by this time was almost unbearable. With every move we made to feel each other, the heat only becoming more and more adiment.

By just a few minutes into it, I was fully undressed. He had grabbed the button on my pants with his hook, using it to pry it open and like he has done it a thousand times before, removed the material from my legs in seconds. Grabbing my arms he held them above my head with his good arm and grabbed the back of my hips with his hook once again, jerking them towards him.

Groaning deep in his throat I hear him speak for the first time since we had been upstairs.

"God damn it, Swan. How am I suppose to punish you when you do this to me?" Grinding his excessively hard buldge into the center, between my legs that he had moved to stand between. My lips curled in a smirk of their own. The pirate that I knew was showing through and out of everything he was doing to me, his words and the grinding movement I could feel myself growing extremely moist.

I believe it was beginning to soak through the denim of his jeans because he let out another sharp growl before working quick to undo his button and zipper, to my surprise springing himself free with no other restraint.

"Well well, Captain, no underwear?" I say it in a heated way which I'm sure he can tell by the sound of my voice I was wanting him to release my hands so I could touch him. But he ignored that silent plea and pushed my wrists harder into the mattress, before claiming my mouth with his again. Tounges dancing over and under one another's. It was all the distraction he needed before I felt the cold steel of his hook hit the center of my moist folds, moving it upwards he caught what he was looking for, that hard nub. Slowing his movement just slightly running the tip of his hook over it again and again.

I don't believe he realised exactly what he was doing to me, but by the way I was moaning and moving against it, he knew how close I was. He knew it would just take a couple more strokes of his now juice covered hook before I would come tumbling over the edge. I gasped when I was feeling my orgasm building deep in my stomach but felt him pull away and take that friction between his hook and my hot center away.

His mischievous stormy blue eyes met mine as he brought the tip of his hook to his mouth, sucking the juices off of it and with a pop letting it slide back out. Groaning loud enough for him to let a deep chuckle out. Positioning himself against my dripping wet sex, tipping his head to the side staring down at me.

"What? Can't take it? What do you want, Swan? Tell me what you want me to do to you and if you tell me something I wanna hear, I might just give it to you. Leaning forward and grabbing one of my since hardened nipples into the extreme heat of his mouth and sucking and biting an assault against it. Tossing my head back so the top of it was against the mattress, he is smirking again. He presumably takes great pleasure in driving me crazy at this moment. I'm trying to find the words when before I can, I feel myself being pulled against him once again. A loud moan slipping from his lips as he feels the wet heat once again on the tip of his throbbing member. His eyes shot to mine as if begging me to tell him what he wants to hear so he can let this tension go and we can just be one for a while.

I whimpered at the thought. "Please Killian... I want you inside me. I want to feel you finally." Hissing almost automatically at the words. Groaning "Fuck it..." And letting my wrists be freed from his tight grip. Instinct and passion kick in almost simultaneously. My arms and legs go around him and he thrusts forward entering with a force that had my world spinning for a good couple seconds. I hadn't yet noticed due to the fact that just the feeling of him filling me to the hilt was making me want to come undone right then and there. But he had steadied himself and was not yet moving. I had a grip on his arms looking up giving him a look of question to which he had replied.

"Just because I'm not being gentle right now, doesn't mean I'm going to hurt you, nor want to. I know its been a while and somehow I doubt you've ever had anyone like this before. I just wanted you to adjust before I fuck you through this mattress." Trailing his words before pulling back and slamming his hips forward again to apply some emphasis as he says the word "... _love_." Moving back and slamming forward once again.

My eyes were beginning to roll towards the back of my head. My hands gripping the sheet in either side of me now to steady myself as his assault began to become faster and more rythematic. God I wish I could make him feel what he's doing to me at this moment. Feeling the moisture from inside me gathering at the base of his shaft. The feeling and thought had me reeling once again. "Oh fuck... Yes Killian!"

He was smirking again. His thrusts getting faster and harder with every moan that slipped out. His own passion building with each movement. "God you have such a dirty mouth there, Swan. I can think of a few other things I'd like you to do with that mouth other than tell me how good I'm fucking you."

His words hitting a nerve deep inside and I have to grab ahold of him again, sliding closer to him, feeling my climax nearing once again.

"Mmmm... You like that? You want it deeper, huh?" Thrusting in shorter harder strokes now, with each delving deeper then the last. That was it, he had found the spot. I couldn't hold back anymore. Throwing myself forward and wrapping my arms around his neck, my now platinum hair falling forward as I had leaned down to watch him thrust one last time, raking my nails up and down his back and cupping his head as my orgasm washed over me. A fit of moans and cries of his name escaping more than once.

"Fuck! Killian! Oh god... I'm cumm...cumming!"

Not sure if it were the words that came out, the feel of the muscles clenching around him or the fact that he was just as close as I was, I felt him stiffen up with one last hard pump and I felt the heat of his seed spilling inside me. After a second of riding out our climaxes, we were clinging to each other. I don't know when it happened but I wasn't going to stop it, that's for certain. Breathing hard against his neck, my head on his shoulder trying to regain some composure as we sat there doing the same, with me straddling him not making a move to pull away or even pull out yet.

After what seemed like a few minutes of this, his finger tips now moving up and down my spine in a feathery touch. The slight yet gentle gesture calming and soothing me all at once. Tangling his fingers in my hair once again, pulled me out of the sexual slumber I had fallen into. I realize he's still inside me. Looking up at his face and noticing something I hadn't earlier. A light that had flickered away was trickling back in. Maybe it wasnt the way I had intended our first time after nearly 2 years of absolute torture to be. But maybe this is what was needed to make him realize we can fight this together. Somehow we can do it as long as its together.

He must have read my thoughts again because as I thought it, he leaned forward brushing just a gentle sweeping kiss against my lips before pulling back just slightly and whispering against them, "Well beautiful. It seems you were right." The smirk popping up on his features one more time. "Maybe this won't be so bad... If I can just burying myself inside you every chance I get."

I believe for the first time since coming back to Storybrooke I feel the pale of my face heat up as the flush comes up my neck and hits my cheeks. Smiling behind the flush of my face, he places his hook under my chin, tilting it upwards to look at him again, a deep chuckle being omit from his chest the twinkle of light becoming more obvious now.

"How could I have doubted that our love wouldn't be enough?" Resting his forehead against mine and nuzzling at my nose with his moving up to drop a kiss on it. "I'm not saying this is over. But what I am saying is that I forgive you. And I think we can do this...together." Just staring into his eyes, I'm too scared to speak just yet. Not sure that it just won't come out as a trembling squeak.

His voice washing over me like a wave again. "I told you, I love you, Emma Swan. No matter what you did..." Shaking his head for a moment. "I just wish you'd have told me sooner. It would have saved us a lot of time wasted away from one another."

That's when it hit me. Why hadn't I just been honest with him. I know what I made myself believe, that he wouldn't let me do what was necessary if he knew. But his words now sinking in. He just may have helped me find _another_ way. I was being selfish and stupid. As the realization of this came crashing down, the tears spilled over again. But this time, met with his thumb brushiing them away.

"I'm sorry Killian. I wasn't thinking. I just couldn't lose you again. I was something that I didn't even realize was capable of a dark one to feel. Fear. I was so scared and I had to deny that I was afraid all at once, which because you can read me so well, I was even more terrified about." Finally being able to speak from my heart since that last day in Camelot. The moment before they both had to succum to darkness to save his life.

"Its alright, love. I can't say I wouldn't have done the same thing. I've come to realize the darkness makes it even more impossible to picture a life without you. I need you in it to keep me on the right path. If I were losing you, I'd have made the same choice. It wasn't selfish. It was human." Planting a soft but knowing kiss on my forehead before pulling away and rolling to settle me onto my back on the mattress. Sliding his now softening member out and slipping onto the pillow beside me, sliding his arm around me and pulling my body towards his. I melted into his side and nuzzled my face into his neck. Pulling myself from this moment for just a moment. Grabbing the top of the comforter and slipping ourselves under it and molding our bodies together again.

I had to let out a laugh and he cocked his eyebrow upward looking down at me through hooded eyes, "What's so funny, beautiful?" Smirking under the chuckle he let out himself.

"Why in the hell did we wait 2 damn years to do that? Why didn't I just let you take me that night you asked me to come stay on the Jolly Roger with you?" Flushing at the othought of how hot that make out session had become before deciding it was time to go home.

"Oh love, you've got me there? I still don't know why I didn't take you up on that offer the day after we got back to Storybrooke. Because apparently, this _is_ me."

Grinning just slightly against his chest, snuggling closer. "Oh well... Were here now." A laugh barely audible escapes his chest. "That we are, love. That we are."

Eyes growing heavy and feeling my exhaustion gaining more and more the longer I lie there in his arms. Feeling safer than I ever have since becoming the dark one. Since **we** became the dark ones. Maybe the dark one doesn't sleep... But maybe the _**dark ones**_ need to. We have to keep our energy up, after all. Giggling softly at the thought crossing my mind once again, my eyes being to drift shut. Sleep finally overcoming me after at least 2 months of insomnia. This was going to be enough. They would be enough.

 _ **Well this was originally going to be a one shot, but this has turned into a few chapters long so here's the first chapter. Let me know what you all think! Reviews please! ㈴2**_


End file.
